I’m going to give you a gift which is that I will tell you the best way to spend your time this year. You do this and you’ll find yourself more successful than ever before. Your dreams will come true. People will flock to you and wonder about the secret to what makes you a high achiever. Jealousy. People will be so hardcore jealous that they will pay someone online to perform voodoo magic on you to stop you. I’m not saying I’ve done something like that. I mean who can afford it multiple times.
But it won’t work. You will be protected by the very thing that got you to that height at which others want to take shots at you. And it’s very simple. Grow your family. Your tribe. The House of You. The Dynasty. The Clan. Have I used enough synonyms to sound smart? You bet I have. Does it get the point across? It should have midway but if it didn’t then stop reading because you are the few who know I have no idea what I’m talking about but don’t tell the others.
For the rest of us, remember that most characters who succeed in TV shows like Walking Dead, GOT etc do so well because they all do one thing really well (why shouldn’t we take our life cues from imaginary people). And that is they know they can survive, nay, thrive when they build strong relationships with others. Based on mutual respect and support. It’s the single biggest factor. There are other things you gotta do but this is THE ONE man.
Building relationships is not easy. It takes time and courage. One has to take extreme measures – reducing your Netflix hours, picking up the phone to call people, stepping out of your house to sit down and have a face to face. Occasionally it might mean listening to other’s viewpoints and even allowing them to talk about themselves. I’ll wait while you take some deep breathes to calm yourself down.
You have no choice. No man is an island. I mean unless that man identifies as an island. Then I’m not sure what the rules are anymore. In my days PC stood for Personal Computers. Apologies. My point is stop and think about anyone who you admire and I can bet all of them had a close knit group around them, the right people, others who were as hungry and all that propelled them up.
In an ideal world you would get ahead based on just your talent and hard work. It’s not true. Cream rises to the top. But it needs the coffee below it to push it upwards. Cream is also made from the higher-fat layer skimmed from the top of milk meaning you are from the same milk as everybody else. Just the fat bit though. And less dense.
People with stronger relationships also live longer, more fulfilling lives. This is based on research conducted by the same group that brought ‘you need vaccinations’. If you would rather believe a meme on the internet instead then that’s a sign that you might need to rethink life.
Is this starting to feel very incoherent? I blame your reading over my writing. See what happens when you insult people. Now you don’t want to continue reading my work. And without you reading and sharing this, I will be left in some random corner of the internet where Myspace hangs out. You need other people. We all need each other. And I don’t mean in a selfish ‘let me use everyone around me’ kind of way. That will push you two steps ahead and five steps back making you look like you’re doing the worst rendition of the moonwalk in history. Nope. Genuine relationships. Friendships. Love.
The irony of our existence is that in order to be great, you can’t beat down people. You need to work with them. Stop reading this on your phone and get out and think of three people you will get in touch with more regularly. Then pick up your phone and call. Good luck. And if you want to meet me for coffee, drop me a note too. 2020 is going to be about building relationships for me.
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